Finding Your Authentic Self

Paula: [00:00:00] Hello everyone and welcome to a special another episode. All my episodes are special. So welcome to another episode of chatting with the experts TV show where I speak with women from Africa and the Caribbean and in the diaspora. These women are professionals and successful business women, and our mission is to inspire women globally, to educate women, and to empower women globally. I sometimes have men as guests on the show, but most of the time, I have these awesome women. So today, our topic is, very interesting, whose shoes are you wearing? Uncovering the woman you really want to be. And with me to do this would be Julian Kiganda, [00:01:00] which is Kiganda. Uganda with a K.
I’ll tell you a bit about her. She’s a transformational brand strategist. She’s an award winning designer, author, and speaker who specializes in building transformational brands for purpose driven clients, ranging from Fortune 500 corporations to multi-million dollar nonprofits and small businesses. Some of her clients have included the Steve Harvey World Group, the National Urban League, and, oh my gosh, the African Union. She’s been featured on the Washington Post, NPR, oh my god, I could say so much about her, but why don’t I ask her to just join us and then we can talk more about all the places and the lives that she’s touched. And with that, let’s welcome Julian Kiganda to the show.
Julian: It is a pleasure [00:02:00] to be with you. Thank you so much for having me, Paula.
Paula: Oh my gosh. I mean, when I read your bio, I was like, Oh, she’s being rubbing shoulders with the rich and famous.
Julian: I’ve been fortunate to work with some amazing people over the course of my career. Oh my gosh.
Paula: I’m sure you have. And you know, the thing is as you work with them, you are learning from them and they are learning from you too. Isn’t that an amazing thing?
Julian: Absolutely. Absolutely. And that’s, I think that’s why I really focus on working with purpose driven clients because you know, when you’re walking in your purpose, it’s like almost everything you do really needs to be focused on that. So I’m always learning, always learning.
I know.
Paula: My mantra is I learn something new every day and it could be from a baby and it could be from a 67 year old person. We all are young. So, true. Yeah, right. So, whose shoes are you wearing? Uncovering the woman you want to be. That’s a book. The [00:03:00] title of a book that you co authored with your sister, you said.
Julian: It is, yeah.
Paula: Tell me more.
Julian: Well, let me show you as I tell you. So, this is the cover of our book. And I know that you mentioned that you really focus on interviewing women of the Caribbean, of Africa, the Diaspora. So, you know, from my last name, some people can tell I’m not American, so to speak. I was actually born in Uganda and this book, and you can see the cover, we’re very proudly wearing African prints on the cover. My sister, Christina and I, we wrote this book. It’s actually been 10 years already since we wrote that book, but we wrote the book because when we’re looking at all of the self help professional development books out there on the market.
We couldn’t find anything that spoke to us both from a cultural and a Christian perspective. And I’m sure you, also coming from parents of African and Caribbean, you can relate to the fact that our [00:04:00] experience is just different. It’s very different. And I think the thing that we found interesting about the book when it came out was although we really wrote it from an African perspective, just about every culture was touched by this book and can relate to it. We had Asian women reaching out to us and saying, my gosh, like you’re speaking my story. We had Latino women. I mean, you name it, Africa, the Caribbean, all over, and African American too. So, It really was very universal.
Paula: Oh, wow. So that’s on my bucket list. I need to get, when I say bucket list, really, I literally, I need to get this book. A lot of my guests have been authors and I take pride in buying their books and having and finding some time to read it. Do you have an audio copy of it?
Julian: You know, we recorded it, we just haven’t published it yet, but the print book is actually available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble and most places where books are [00:05:00] sold. But at some point, yes. You reminded us we do need to publish the audio version.
Paula: All right, because I’ll be, obviously I’ll be one of the first ones to buy that because I love it.
Julian: Ah, okay. Well, now it’s on my list of things to do in the next few months.
Paula: Yeah. So when you and I spoke, we mentioned that one thing you want to talk about is what happens one day when you wake up and realize the things that you thought you’d heal from in the past actually making that uncomfortable reappearance in your life. How do you deal with that?
Julian: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, these past, I would say particularly the past two and a half, three years have been quite the journey. When we wrote the book, Whose Shoes are you Wearing? That was 2010. So I was four years post divorce. And I actually wrote about my divorce in the book because [00:06:00] again, even as I was going through my divorce, it was very hard for me to find resources to show me, okay, what have other people done to get through this? Like, how do people recover from this? Because I think, you know, unless you’ve been through it, you, you don’t really understand that a divorce is, is like grieving a death.
And so you go through all of the emotions and the processing of just everything and the end of something and hopefully the beginning of something better, you know, if you do the work. That was one of the reasons that I wrote about it in the book was because I hadn’t really seen people who talked about it and what it was like, you know, when you get married, you don’t get married to get divorced, you know, most people don’t. So I think I had felt that, you know, okay, man I’ve been through the worst of it. Like the divorce was, Ooh, I never want to go through that again. And it was just, it’s trauma, you know, for a lot of people it’s trauma. And at the time. My daughter was nine months old, you know, when we’re going through the [00:07:00] divorce.
So
Paula: Woah.
Julian: It was, oh, it was tough. It was tough in a lot of ways, but you know, for so many reasons. And I would say she was a major reason why I said, you know what? I can’t afford to become bitter from this. I have to become better. So I made sure I did the work. I worked with coaches. I worked with counselors that I worked on myself. I mean, I really did the work and in the process of doing that work, you know, there were certain things that I understood. Okay. Well, this is why this happened the way it did. And I also had to take accountability because, you know, I truly understand now that even if other people have done you wrong, unless you take accountability for your own role in certain situations, because we allow certain things, you know, you can be the kindest person in the world, but I am learning more and more the importance of setting [00:08:00] boundaries. And so many times we do not set those boundaries. And I think even culturally, you know, I recognize that that’s not something we’re really taught.
Paula: So right. I was just thinking, oh, when you said that boundaries, I had to learn that too. It’s not something we have taught. It’s rude. I’m almost the same with boundaries.
Julian: Yes, yes, yes. And unfortunately, I think it works to our detriment as we get older, you know, so it’s something many of us have to learn as adults. And because you’re not setting those boundaries, people are able to take advantage of you and do certain things and you know, whether or not you’re aware of that, you know, once you start really going on this healing journey and you start doing the work to learn about yourself and even uncover, like, what is it in you that attracted this into your life?
Or what is it that allowed this certain situation to actually manifest in your life? Like once you really start paying attention, then it’s like, Oh, okay. I feel like that’s when God is like, okay, we have [00:09:00] something to work with here because until you take accountability and ownership over certain things, you’re going to remain stuck and it’s going to be like living on a hamster wheel.
Paula: You are absolutely right about taking ownership of like, I also could have done better. Exactly. But I grew from having gone through this.
Julian: Absolutely. Absolutely. And I think I felt that after having gone through that, I was like, okay, I’ve done the work. I wrote the book. It helps so many people. You know, the interesting thing about the book was again, we wrote it from our perspective as African women growing up in America ’cause I was born in Uganda. My sister who I co authored a book with is actually born here, but it didn’t matter. Like we were raised in an African household.
Paula: So you’ve gone home, right?
Julian: That was it. You know. You know the story. You know the story.
Paula: Yes.
Julian: I don’t care what your friends out there are doing.
Paula: Not in this house.
Julian: My gosh, you know, I didn’t appreciate that growing [00:10:00] up for sure. But now in hindsight, I’m like, you know, there’s so many things I appreciate about our parents actually, in some ways, forcing us to appreciate our culture.
Paula: Yes.
Julian: You know, I mean, now, exactly. You know, now we have Wakanda and Afrobeats, but we didn’t have that back then, you know, you’d never wanted to admit you were from Africa back in those days. So it took work, you know, and so, you know, you do the work and things improve. And honestly, like, I just feel like when I went through my divorce, I felt like that was actually the beginning of me. I was no longer identifying myself by who I was married to, who I was connected to, who I was in a relationship with. And what I’ve come to also recognize is, you know, I don’t know how to put this in a way that. I’m not even gonna be politically correct with this. So East African men, you know, I’ve found that many of them [00:11:00] want women who are very, you know, demure and subservient and, you know, just, yes, honey. Yeah. You know, and I just, I had a really hard time with that because that’s not me by nature.
That does not be my nature. And I found that when I was in my marriage, I had to dim my light. I had to become less than who I was created to be in order to be acceptable in my marriage. So once I went through my divorce, that was an opportunity for me to really discover, like, who am I and what do I want and how am I going to redefine myself in this new chapter in my life? So that was, my gosh, such a time of transformation and growth for me in my life. But again, I had to be willing to do the work, you know. And part of doing the work, which so many of us are afraid of is actually feeling the pain, you know.
Paula: Going to ask you that. Getting [00:12:00] real, right? With yourself.
Julian: Oof. Bad part. Bad part. In fact there’s a chapter in the book called Keeping it real. It’s actually the very first chapter. Keeping it real. Removing the weave, the lashes, and the heels. Because we put on these masks in our lives because, you know, again, we’re afraid not just to be who we really are, but in allowing ourselves to be who we really are, like, what is it that we’re going to really feel that we may be avoiding by putting on this mask? You know, and that was a big part of what I had to do in that time and space is I had to take off the mask and everything that, you know, in our community, people were shocked when they found that we were getting a divorce because we look like the perfect couple and, you know, all these things.
But, you know, when I got real. I realized everything happens for a reason, but honestly, we probably never should have gotten married. We [00:13:00] probably made better friends than we did husband and wife. But again, it was one of those things where culturally he fits all of the things. He checked off all the boxes, you know, that African parents are looking for.
Paula: Right family.
Julian: Yeah.
Paula: Good job.
Julian: Yes. Yeah.
Paula: Making enough money.
Julian: Yep. Yep. All the things, you know, and I think when I got a chance to keep it real, like that was actually when I was able to allow myself to feel the pain. You know, these days they have something called, I think it’s a fairly new term to have something called spiritual bypassing.
Paula: Hmm. Haven’t heard of that one. Okay.
Julian: Yeah.
Paula: Let me add that to my, I said, I’d learn something new every day. This is the one for today. Spiritual bypassing.
Julian: Spiritual bypassing. So basically that’s when instead of actually going through something and feeling the pain and doing the Berkeley Hill from it, you just pray it away. You sing it away. It’s all spiritual. And you know, it’s just another form of avoiding [00:14:00] dealing with the pain. And I knew instinctively, and this is where I’m grateful because I’ve always, I feel like… I grew up in a very prayerful family, and so I feel like I’ve always had a good relationship with my Creator, and so I instinctively knew, I divinely knew that if I did that, it wasn’t called spiritual bypassing at the time, but basically just avoiding dealing with it and then ending up in the same place. I instinctively knew if I did that, that was then going to pass on to my daughter and that it’s one of those things. It’s kind of like, you know, if you have an infection and instead of actually going into the infection and cleaning it out and, you know, putting the hydrogen peroxide and putting the ointment on and, you know, but you got to go in the room to clean it.
There’s some people who don’t even go into it. They just put a band-aid on it. And the infection gets worse, you know, so I instinctively knew that, that would not [00:15:00] work in my favor. And so in, in that moment, I did the best that I could with what I knew. And I actually think I did really well because it was in that time that, I mean, my business just grew exponentially after that. And I think it was because I got really clear. Like I said, I took the time to really work on me and I got really clear about what I wanted as an individual without being connected to somebody else or, you know, looking at, you know, what did they want from me or what am I supposed to look like if I’m married to them?
And is this going to be, is this going to make them look good? You know, that it was no longer about that. It was about, okay, what do I really want and how am I going to use these gifts that I’ve been given, you know? They say to who much is given much is expected.
Paula: Yes.
Julian: And you know the next few years after that my gosh it was such an amazing time in my life.
Paula: So what I’m hearing from you is that you got rid of the external [00:16:00] identifiers and looked into yourself, knew who you were created to be, as you said, created by God, your creator, your gifts, your purpose, and you ran with that, who you are.
Julian: Yes, I ran. I ran with it and things were great for a while, but you know…
Paula: For a while. So something changed.
Julian: For a while. Well, you know, I think what and I think the older you get, the more you recognize this is that like your life is in cycles. Life happens in cycles. You know, I’ve heard it said, and I think this is true, that you’re either just coming out of something, you’re about to go through something, or you’re going through it. You know, and so in those moments when you’re not going through it, things are great. Like things are moving. My business grew, my daughter was doing amazing. I had a very robust life, you know, [00:17:00] social life. I, you know, took initiative and really got involved in my community and just had some incredible experiences because of that.
And then I think what happens is, you know, it’s kind of like I, I like to compare it to being in school. Right? So when you’re in school, like you go through primary, secondary, you know, get your associates, some people, bachelors. So every one of those grades and every one of those, you know, Times in your life, it requires different tests. And in order to graduate, the tests get harder. In order to graduate to the next level, the tests become more difficult.
Paula: That’s so true. Yeah.
Julian: Yeah. And that’s what I realized. I was like, okay, I clearly must have mastered that, you know, chapter my life.
Paula: Level or chapter. Yeah.
Julian: Exactly. That level. And it was like, okay. God was like, okay…
Paula: Next one.
Julian: Time. Yep. For the next one. Like, you [00:18:00] got too comfortable. You can’t get too comfortable. And if you do, something’s going to happen to shift in your life so that you now have to shift. And to get through certain things, you have to become a different version of yourself. And I believe you always have a choice. You can either choose to, you know, stay comfortable in the pain of being uncomfortable, or you can choose to say, you know what, okay, this is painful, I’m gonna sit here with it, but I’m not going to stay here.
Paula: Yeah. That’s a big one. I’m not going to stay here, but I can sit in it.
Julian: Yes.
Paula: Learn from it, take deep breaths, say mmm.
Julian: Yeah.
You know, you mentioned something about energy vampires.
Ooh, ooh, my gosh. So that was part of my graduating [00:19:00] to the next level. That’s what I realized. And I honestly just realized that very recently when I was just taking an analysis of all the different cycles I’ve been through, the different chapters in my life and looking at, okay, what is it that caused that shift? What do I need to learn so that I don’t have to come back here again? And I realized that, you know, although I had healed for from a number of things. That one of the things, and again, it goes back to, you know, how you’re raised without boundaries, I was a people pleaser.
Julian: You know, for a lot of immigrant families, your parents. It’s all about the grades. It’s all about accomplishment. It’s all about, you know, all those things. And so in order, and again, I don’t blame my parents. Like this is what they knew, you know, this is what they were taught. And they just wanted the best for us. But a lot of the approval from your parents often comes from how well you’re doing in school.
Paula: Yes.
Julian: And so if you’re [00:20:00] doing well, then you get all the…
Paula: Excellent child.
Julian: Accolades. Yes. Yes.
Paula: And you know the other thing I was telling my son, or one of my children recently that, remember we came from environments where we didn’t have as many resources. So we are coming here to better ourselves and we are saying, these children can get this that I did not have and that. Ah, we didn’t get it so they can.
Julian: Exactly. Exactly. And that’s the thing you always want. Most parents want better for their children. So I think that’s a big part of where the people pleasing came from, you know, just going up culturally where no was not an acceptable answer for pretty much anything.
Paula: Except for the bad things.
Julian: Except for the
Paula: but everything else.
Julian: Yeah.
Paula: No wasn’t a sentence.
Julian: Oh my gosh, not at all. Not at all. And so you grow up like that and subconsciously you become a people pleaser, but that people pleasing and not wanting people to be upset with you, [00:21:00] it transfers into your relationships, personal and professional. So you allow certain things because you’re afraid of offending somebody.
Paula: Yeah.
Julian: And I realized I was like, my goodness, I let so many people into my life and I allowed them to stay there, even if they made me uncomfortable. I allowed them to stay there because by nature, I’m an empath. And so empaths, people who are very empathetic, like you feel people’s pain. And you often, until you learn better, you often put other people’s feelings ahead of your own, which is why it’s so hard to have boundaries. Because you’re so concerned about them and how they’re going to feel. And you know, if what you say is going to hurt them, if saying no is going to hurt them, even though it makes you uncomfortable, like you’re so concerned about that, that you put your own wellbeing on the line.
And I realized that I, my goodness, I have done that for [00:22:00] quite some time in all types of relationships, personal and professional. And so when that happened, somehow, someway, it’s like they have GPS signals, right? These energy vampires, they will find you. They will find you, they will target you, and they will suck everything they can out of you until you realize. Oh no, enough is enough. Like, I can no longer do this. I have nothing left for myself. And so, I think it was around that time, when things were going really well, you know. Again, people see you doing well and then they attach themselves to you or find ways to attach themselves to you, to your success, to what you’re doing. And I’m one of those people, I’d cheer all people who are doing well, like please, you know, like I want, but you start realizing not everybody’s like that. Not everyone is like that. There’s people who see you and they want to attach themselves to you so they can take from you versus contributing to you.
Paula: [00:23:00] Yes.
Julian: And so, yeah, energy vampires are definitely a thing. They’re definitely a thing. And here’s the thing. Many of them don’t start off feeling like energy vampires. Many of them start off feeling like they’re very generous people, like they really care about you, like, you know, they’re interested, genuinely interested in you and your well being until they get really comfortable and start seeing that they’ve gained your trust. And that’s when things start shifting, but it’s so subtle that you don’t even realize what it is because they’ve already gained so much of your trust and so much of your energy that you start seeing things like gaslighting.
And you’re like, did that actually happen? Like, you start second guessing yourself. And it gets to the point where you stop following your own instincts. And I think one of the greatest lessons I have learned in this past year, because I’ve dealt with so much this past year but it was another major [00:24:00] time of growth and transformation for me.
One of the greatest lessons I have learned is we have that gut instinct for a reason. And it’s so important for us to not necessarily pay attention to what people are saying to us, pay attention to how they make you feel. Because if you really pay attention to that, usually your first instinct is the right instinct about people.
Paula: Yes, you are spot on because I was speaking to someone recently and we’re Christians too, when we talked about you know, the word says do unto others as you’d like them to do unto you.
Julian: Yeah.
Paula: But I said, but I’ve also discovered that you want people to treat you the way you want to be treated and you will have to treat people the way they want to be treated. So I may feel that if someone shouts at me, that means they love me. But if I shout at somebody else and that’s not their understanding of love, they feel I hate them.
Julian: Yes.
Paula: Their [00:25:00] understanding, you know?
Julian: A hundred percent. A hundred percent. And that actually makes me think of the five love languages. You know, that and that, oh gosh, I forgot the author. John Gray is it? I don’t know. I don’t remember. I don’t think it’s John Gray.
Paula: I don’t remember.
Julian: Yeah. But I think a lot of people have heard of the book. Are you familiar with the five love languages? Yeah. Like that book was life changing for me because it helps you really understand that the way… to your point, the way you receive love and feel like somebody cares about you may be very different from how somebody else receives love and feel like you care about them. So it just, but again, it goes back to really learning to be still and pay attention to your feelings versus all the stuff that you’re hearing, because words can be very misleading. But your gut will never lie to you.
Paula: Yes. Yes. So let’s talk also about forgiveness, because I know that’s a big part of healing, [00:26:00] moving forward.
Julian: Yes. Yeah.
Paula: Anytime that one has been hurt. You’ve got to forgive yourself, right?
Julian: Oh my goodness. Honestly, forgiving yourself is actually harder than forgiving other people.
Paula: You’re right, because you’re living with you.
Julian: Yes.
Paula: You know?
Julian: Yes it really is. And I’ll tell you when it comes to forgiveness, you know, they often say that forgiveness is not for the other person, it’s for you.
Paula: Mm hmm.
Julian: But that is so true, because what we don’t realize is holding on to stuff, holding on to emotions, you know. Your thoughts and your feelings can make you sick.
Paula: Yes.
Julian: That’s where stress comes from. If you’re ruminating on things all the time, it’s going to make you sick. And so again, that’s one thing that I also recognize, like, look, I can’t hold onto unforgiveness and bitterness because again, like, what are you going to attract into your life if that’s what you’re holding onto, you [00:27:00] know? So I, I had to learn to forgive, but I think part of the key to forgiveness is again, just being really honest about what that person did to you, how it made you feel, and then taking ownership and responsibility for your role in the situation. Because if you were in the situation, you played a role, you know, you definitely played a role, whatever that looks like, you know, and that’s specifically speaking to adults. Because, you know, children, you know, they often don’t have a choice in the situations that they’re in so that’s a little different. But as adults, you know, we have decisions that, you know, we have the free will to make. So what decisions are we making that are putting us in situations like that?
So for me, forgiveness was definitely about, I don’t have room to hold onto this. Because if I’m holding onto this, it’s like, There’s no room for goodness in my life, so I have to release that, and I’ll say one of my favorite thing, and I had to do this actually [00:28:00] just a few months ago. One of my favorite exercises on forgiveness is there’s actually two of them. One of them, I think I got from my counselor the first time, where you write a letter to the person, you write out everything you want to say to them, everything they did to you, everything you want to get out of your system, and you just write it down, but you never mail it. You can burn it up, you can trash it, whatever it is, but the key is to let it out because there is therapy.
I’m one of those people, I have journals dating back to probably elementary school, like I have always written stuff down. Oh yeah, like because that’s because it’s how I’m able to process things. And I found that when I write things down, there’s a release that comes from that because it’s no longer in your head. You’re no longer really ruminating and holding it up here, but you’re actually getting it out. Even writing the book was very therapeutic because again you’re getting these things out of your head, out of your system, out of your heart, so you no longer have to hold on to [00:29:00] them and think about them as hard. But then, you know, a lot of times the people who you’re looking to forgive, they don’t even know they need to be forgiven.
Paula: That’s so true. You are busy, you know, every time you see them, your blood pressure goes up.
Julian: Oh my gosh.
Paula: And they’re innocent. I mean, not that they’re innocent. They may not be innocent, but…
Julian: right.
Paula: They’re unaware.
Julian: They’re unaware. They’re completely ignorant, living their own life. And so that’s why, you know, writing the letter doesn’t mean you have to send it, right? It’s for you to release that so you can move on. So that’s one exercise that has always helped me. And sometimes that letter may need to be to yourself. Which is actually something I’m working with a yoga therapist now who is amazing. And that’s actually something she recommended that I do. She’s like, you know, you’ve done that for other people. You might need to do that for yourself. And so that’s one exercise. The second one for, on forgiveness is actually getting like post it notes and writing down everybody you need to forgive for whatever you need to [00:30:00] forgive them about.
So, I forgive so and so for doing this to me. I forgive so and so for doing that. I forgive so and so for not doing, you know, whatever that is. Write it all down. And then take all those pieces of paper, put them in the fireplace, you know, find somewhere safe place, please, or you can burn them up and release it and turn it into your own ritual of forgiveness. And there’s something about taking action, like doing some kind of activity to release certain things that it actually becomes more real to you. So that’s what I’d recommend because, you know, again, when you’re holding onto something I’m telling you unforgiveness, anger, bitterness, all those things will make you sick.
There are people who are still ruminating over things that happened to them 5-10 years ago and they’ve stopped living and the people who, you know, done whatever, they’re moving on with their lives. So you’re the one suffering, you [00:31:00] know?
Paula: Yes. Yes. Yes. Well, you know, we could talk forever. I can’t believe that 30 minutes has gone by so quickly.
Julian: I know.
Paula: Oh, it’s always when you’re having the best conversations that you have the time limits. But one last thing to talk about before we let other people who have joined us questions other than me, how can you rebuild after loss to create a new version of yourself? Give us like two tips and then we’ll have the floor to others to ask.
Julian: Yeah, I think the biggest thing that I have learned because it’s, my goodness, I’ve lost count of the funerals that I’ve attended in the past two years. So it’s been, it’s definitely been one of those times for me, I think the biggest thing has been realizing that healing requires every aspect of yourself. And what I mean by that is therapy alone is not enough. I am a huge proponent of therapy, but [00:32:00] therapy alone is not enough because we are spiritual beings, we’re emotional, we’re physical, we’re psychological, we’re mental. So you really have to address all those aspects of yourself if you’re really trying to heal fully. So for me, what I realized I had to do was go beyond just the therapy to look at what are other things I can do that will actually allow me to heal. So that’s everything from meditation to becoming a very proud plant mom, like plants are actually very therapeutic.
Paula: They are.
Julian: Oh my goodness. I love my plants. I talk to them every day. They all have names. But really it danced, you know, for many of us dance. We may not realize if dance is also for… movement is therapeutic because it releases again, it releases all of these things from your body. And being really intentional about it. So, what I learned was in order for me to truly heal and find joy in my life again, I had to address every aspect of myself. And I actually wrote an ebook [00:33:00] about it called Rediscovering Joy which if people are interested, they can find it at rediscoveringjoyguide.com. It’s a free download.
Paula: Okay. Awesome. Awesome. And that’s a good point to end on because that’s something I’ve been telling a lot of people. Choose joy.
Julian: Yes.
Paula: Let us choose joy. You know, you can choose sadness. You can choose. There’s so many things to choose, but why not just choose joy?
Julian: It’s a choice. Absolutely. Absolutely.
Paula: So because we’re going to open up the floor for other people who have joined to ask you more questions other than moi, how can people find you online if they’re listening to this afterwards?
Julian: So you can find me everywhere. My personal social media is julianbkiganda, at julianbkiganda. I’m on LinkedIn. LinkedIn and Instagram are probably my most active platforms. I’m on Facebook too, but LinkedIn, Instagram would be better to find me. And then in terms of the work that [00:34:00] I do, so I actually created a platform called Emerge Live. And that is to support women who are going through their own mental health and wellness challenges. And it’s something that I’m very committed to just because I went through a very close mental breakdown this year. It was rough. And I realized I’m grateful because I have the support system and the tools that I needed, but so many don’t.
So I created that platform. And we’re always posting content. We have products that help women just support them along their journey of healing. So you can also find more information on that at emergeliveexp on all social media platforms.
Paula: Awesome. And for those of you who are listening in, not part of the audience, I want you to know that just as Julian became a guest, so can you. You can reach out to me on my website, which is chattingwiththeexperts.com. I’m also on LinkedIn as Paula Okonneh. I’m on Instagram, and my handle there is at [00:35:00] chat_experts_podcast. And I am on Facebook. And I’m really working hard to be more on Facebook because I tend to do LinkedIn and IG before I do Facebook.
Julian: Yeah.
Paula: Don’t judge me now, but that’s it. And so thank you again Julian for being such a phenomenal guest on Chatting…
Julian: Thank you for having me.
Paula: With the experts. Thank you. And we’ll open up the floor for more questions. Thank you.